Miss Debrett on... Seduction
When the bedroom door is closed, and
the stage is set for seduction, be aware
that your every move will be subject to
forensic scrutiny. If the seduction
is anticipated you will have
flattering lighting, any
troubling signs of sad
underwear, games consoles,
top shelf magazines) ruthlessly
excised. Ensure that your bedroom
does not bear the traces of previous occupancy (photographs, stray items of lingerie, cosmetics). No woman is going to be interested, or impressed, by the notches on your bedpost.
Coming on to a woman like a second-rate lothario is an instant turn-off: she won't be seduced by your Casanova-style antics, just depressed to find herself the last in a long line of 'conquests'. It is so much better to relax and take it slowly, and be guided by her.
You won't need a crystal ball to know when she's giving you a
green light; but if proceedings have stalled at amber, or worse,
have ground to a halt at red, remember that 'no' really does mean
'no'. Accept her decision with good grace, and never, ever try to
change her mind. A gentlemanly response to refusal will earn
you brownie points, and may even ensure you have better luck next time.
If all goes well, remember that your behaviour in the immediate aftermath and on the following morning is absolutely crucial. Women like pillow talk and affection; turned backs, neanderthal grunts and snores are an instant turn-off. Bring her breakfast in bed the following morning and there's every chance that she'll be coming back for more.
Miss Debrett's Top Tips
- Set the stage. Think about time and place carefully, and make sure that your choice of location is suitable.
- Relax and take things slowly - forceful or unexpected advances are likely to be a turn off. She won't be seduced by your Casanova-style moves.
- Remember that successful seduction requires as much aftercare and nurturing as it does preparation.