'I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.'
If you have membership of a private club don't ever boast about it. If you are inviting guests, be aware that they may not know what to expect and keep them informed; are ladies permitted? Is there a dress code? Accompany them into the club or meet them at the door so you can sign them in.
If you are a visitor yourself respect the club's codes of conduct. Emulate the behaviour of members, dress appropriately and don't tip the staff.
It is generally considered a bit desperate if you ask someone to nominate you for membership of their club. It is best to wait until you are 'invited' to join. Remember that you will be a reflection of them if they put you forward - make sure you 'fit in' to encourage that much coveted invitation.